Sunday, December 5, 1999

5 December 1999

I was Santa Claus.

Well, I was a girl named Mary, a star of the telly in a world or future where Christmas was no more important a holiday than any other obscure saint's day.

One day when I was in the Box (Telly was like television, only instead of acting, the performers went into what they called the Box and imagined the show telepathically. It wasn't remarkable to us - it was hot, intense work. In fact, I didn't remember that "telly" stood for "telepathic" until after I'd woken up.) Anyway, something weird happened during a show during which the script called for me to mention Christmas. I'm not sure what happened, but when I came out of the Box, it was covered with small, flashing lights.

The next morning, I felt compelled tot ake a handful of jelly beans with me when I left my apartment. Four were yellow, and two green. Almost as soon as I'd stepped into the hallway, two fans accosted me - I was used to this - and for some reason I gave each of them two jelly beans. One girl got one of each color, and the other got two yellows. For some reason, it was important that I keep one of each color in my hand.

Two more fans spotted me as I was heading for the elevator and started chasing me. They managed to slip into the elevator with me. I wanted to be annoyed, but one said, "Is it true, Mary, that you're Santa Claus?" I gave them the last two jelly beans.

As I did so, the elevator tipped, and suddenly we three were flying over the city in this glass-and-brass elevator. I wondered if the people on the ground could see us, and imagined reindeer pulling the elevator along, which made me laugh. I told the girls that we'd be lucky if we didn't land there, and pointed.

My sketch of Mary become Santa Claus sitting on her elevatorSuddenly, I was standing alone on a street, and I knew it was because I had pointed to it. A completely nasty man appeared in a doorwar and said some very nasty things - imagine, if you would, a sheltered rich girl being dropped into the middle of a slum. I'm sure you can fill in most of what he said. I was beginning to feel afraid when another man appeared. This man was very old, and wearing a grey knit cap. I knew without knowing how that he never took that cap off - that it was a treasure. Both of them were harranguing me now, and I was suddenly angry. I glared at the first man and said, "INSIDE!" and he disappeared. I advanced on the second, and he backed away from me into his home. As I stood on his doorstep, I demanded, "Name?"

Sullendly, he answered, "Junior. Clarence Wittingsworth Junior."

"Do you remember Christmas, Junior? Do you remember Santa Claus?"

"I... I heard about it as a kid."

I left, and Junior was wearing a new red and green sweater. (The other guy I left wearing a pink, yellow, and pale green jacket - a girlchild's jacket sized for an adult.)

About then, I'd figured it out, and started to have fun. One girl was waiting for me, greedy - she had some plan to get everything she wanted from me. I put her to sleep, and left all the things she wanted, but sized for the doll I also left.

When the dream ended, I was looking for the little boy whose true belief had brought Santa Claus back into the world.

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