Friday, May 29, 2009

Into the Wild Blue

So I'm leaving tomorrow morning to fly to San Antonio to visit my grandmother (and my dad, who's there with her). The trip is as much to provide him a little support as it is to visit her.

But it's also about visiting her. When my grandfather was dying, I waffled and weaseled and let my family talk me out of making the trip. When he died, I didn't find out for more than a day, and by then it was too late to make the trip for the funeral. I've always regretted that I didn't go, either to say goodbye or to help my family through the funeral. The reasons that I thought I had turned out to be not as compelling as I thought, at the time.

Grandmom isn't dying -- at least, she isn't on her deathbed. But her health has been deteriorating quickly over the last few years, and I strongly suspect she's still living now only because she's always had an iron will. When she finally decides she's ready to go, I expect she'll slip away very quickly indeed. I may not be able to make a deathbed visit. I suspect that's part of why my dad and his brother have been taking turns staying with her, even though she could very conceivably live for several more years.

The other part of why they're there is that she can no longer live in her apartment. It's too dangerous -- has been for several years now, if the truth must be told. She's fought tooth and nail the move to the assisted living facility, but it's overdue. So Dad and my uncle are sorting through her things and paring them down for the move. That can't be an easy task. I don't know if they're even telling her about it -- her bad memory is even worse when she doesn't want to hold on to something, so I don't know if she'd remember that she's moving even if they did tell her.

I've been told that they want me to look through her jewelry while I'm there and help sort out the nice things from the costume jewelry. I'm not sure why that falls to me, except that I was the favorite grandchild for a long time, and I'm the only one with children who might enjoy playing dress-up with the discarded costume stuff (and if you don't think I'm ambivalent about that notion, you can think again). Oh, well, we'll see how it goes.

I expect it to be a somewhat hectic trip. I'm arriving Saturday evening around dinnertime (a slightly late dinner, at that) and may not even get to see Grandmom until Sunday -- I don't know what the visiting hours are at the recovery facility or how strictly they're kept. Sunday will be devoted to visiting and packing, and then I'll need to head for the airport around mid-morning on Monday (I'll be getting home right around Penny's bedtime that evening).

Matt suggested that I try to get my dad to go with me to see the new Star Trek movie while I'm there, which is an excellent notion, though I'm not sure where we'd fit it in. One of the evenings, I expect, after visiting hours are done with. And I'm taking my laptop -- I've loaded it with movies to watch if things get slow, and I can show Grandmom pictures of the kids to give us something to talk about (it's very hard to have a conversation with someone whose short-term memory shorts out every few minutes). Plus, it would be nice if the Village's wireless network will allow me to video-conference home, so I can talk to Matt and Penny. Failing that, I'm taking my iPhone, of course.

I'm going to try really hard to pack carryon-only. It seems ridiculous to check a bag for a two-day trip when I'm not even going to need to take a jacket with me. A pair of shorts, a couple of shirts, and enough socks and underwear to get me through should do the trick. I won't need my purse -- I slim down for trips and just take my ID, a credit card, and a little cash. If the laptop will fit, I think I can get everything into my old backpack with room to spare.

I'm not a very good traveler, and this trip isn't for the most fun of reasons, but I think I'm ready.

Up, up, and away.

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